Splendour in the Grass

Hello homos. Yeah I'm gonna leave up that piccie of Miranda Kerr cos i think she is the hottest chick I don't know, even though she has committed the cardinal sin of marrying the hetero way.

So I came to Splendour prepared to observe the lezzelles. What are they wearing? Do they have nice tattoos? Piercings? Do I like their hair and do I want to steal that idea for my next haircut?

All of this I do for you, dear reader.

In the line for the showers at a festival campground was a good opportunity for me to check out the flame-haired chick with the forearm tatt. I decided to include Jess in my observations and garner some comment for the purposes of the blog.

“hey look at her, nice tatt eh”
“what?”
“behind me”
“who?”
“the chick with the red hair and cool tatt, that I’m pointing at, thaaaat one”
“ummm reeal subtle chops”

Obviously I was alone in this review of Splendour lezzas. A lone wolf you might say. No doubt being the 'newcomer', I do need some honing of the gaydar. Of course I was also there for the music. Just don't ask me what I saw.

I carried on with my task dutifully. I optimistically decided she was gay, due to tatt, piercings, hair and general demeanour. So far i have not been proved technically wrong in my 'optimism'.

While we are on the subject of the shower block, the toilets were ‘composting” not only non-shagworthy but I think I used the term putrid for the smell. Better than a Youth Hostel though, I’m sure.

I was hanging at the Mix-up tent and was about to start crapping on to some chick about the band, when her gf returned. I am not brave or stupid enough to sidle up to a couple unless properly introduced. Chicks are reeeal possessive at the best of times, and I ain’t gonna put myself in a position to get into a stinkeye match with a stranger who had a chain instead of a belt.

Seeing Florence and the Machine was a kickass highlight (amongst many others) and inspired a dye job of my hacked up and shaved hair. Hypnotic Red by L'Oreal. This little winner is proving to be getting me some nice comments amongst the womenfolk at work. The menfolk also seem to dig it which is less fun.

Post-Splendour was a roadtrip to Byron, back where I grew up. We chowed down on some delicious buttermilk pancakes at the Clarks Beach cafe where the staff are quite pretty and I quite like their little aprons. They don't actually look like this, but i have a little imagination.

There is also a fine establishment called the Green Garage where I purchased the required daily coffee and made nice with the lady with all the piercings. Let's call her Dale. I also like that she didn't ask me to pay for the first two coffees i got there. Sweet.

Am I ever gonna get too old to check women out and stop being a dirty perve?? Lets give it a few more years at least, I'm still learning.

xx Charlie